Man that's SKINTIGHT!

Guys at SkinTight hanging out

Ok, I left you hanging yesterday, and here it is. SkinTight parties are the ones in NYC where guys get together at a bar and wear their spandex (biking, superhero, wrestling singlets, leather, latex and Under Armour, and much, much more). They can dance and drink and make a night of it. I think it's kind of like a celebration of your fetish. I don't know who thought up the idea but a guy named Droo, (yes I spelled it right), has become the spandex prince of NYC. He is the organizer and host from what I can tell of the parties.


More Guys at SkinTight hanging out, I love the guy in the speedo!

I have seen Droos pics online for a while and chatted with him on AIM. He seems like a great guy. He's big time into gear so you know he scores points with me! The parties have been at some other bars and have moved to the current one. At this one, it's preferred if you wear some type of skin tight clothing, but it's not necessary to get into the event. There is an area for people to change so they don't have to walk the streets of NYC dressed as a college wrestler, or as Spiderman. You can wear anything from an Under Armour shirt with jeans, or a latex catsuit. Mostly it's some type of lycra gear. Which I think is cool, because from what I understand about the last parties, they were in an open bar, and I know if I were going I'd stay home, to have the regular queens be bitchy about the gear and really tear into people (Make fun of them)* I'm of the school, if you're having fun and not hurting anyone, there's no reason for someone to make fun of them. That's just me though, & although I don't always live up to it, you never intentionally hurt someones feelings. I know there are tons of fetishes out there, some of which I don't quite understand, but as long as you're consenting adults, knock yourself out. Ok, off the soap box and back to reality.


Not sure what the guy on the left is wearing, either a skin suit or looks like a BMX suit, either way it's HOT

If I remember correctly the parties started as HardComixxx, with kind of superhero theme. Guys would dress up in superhero costumes, (spandex and the like), and get together. Now that is very hot! As a kid, who didn't want to strip Aquaman or Robin and have their way with them? As you notice they always drew the guys with big bulges. I guess the gay guys in the comic book world drew the men they way they wanted, and the str8 guys in the comic book world drew women with large breasts. Like most guys though I don't have a superhero costume and couldn't wear one that often. So I think the move to all things spandex really gets more guys involved. Rather then spending big money, (some of the Superman costumes I've seen have been over $400, & Droo told me about Spiderman suits upwards of $1,500.00!), you can wear something you already own and just go hang out.


Gear guy supreme Droo, in front in the red/black skinsuit

As you can see by some of the pics there are some guys who like to wear superhero costumes, and there are others who just wear spandex. I think it's a cool mix. You see guys hanging out, dancing and drinking beer. Now that's my kind of night. And btw, Droo said it was cool to post the pics. I wanted to make sure before I did. I think it's really cool that guys in NYC are really embracing their fetish. There have been guys who have come all the way from Greece, Europe, China, Australia, and from points all over the USA. I really want to go up and go to one. As you can see by the pics the guys aren't all super muscle studs, most are just average guys and to me that's perfect. I think the parties are awesome.


A hot super hero and latex/rubber suit on the other hot guy

You can keep up to date with party information at the following internet addresses:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SkinTightNYC/

http://hometown.aol.com/skintight212718/

Something Fun……

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Hot Guy of the Week #6

This guy is very cute to me. Just a guy next door type that I love! What a cute face!



OK had to make a change, due to the fact the pic wouldn't load right. This is a hottie in the pool. It makes me want to work out and get guns like that!

Enjoy more to come later


DISCLAIMER: I make no claims as to the sexual orietnation of guys in the Hot Guys of the Week, they are pics of guys i think that are hot that i get off the net.

Life Goes On.........

Ok, I planned to do something special for my one year anniversary of the blog but this week has really been one from hell. I found out Monday, quite unexpectedly too, that the family business closed. So that means that I’m out of a job, well as soon as we get everything wrapped up.

It’s kind of been a roller coaster of emotions. I never liked working for the family but, it was something that I wanted to succeed due to my parents. They put a lot of money in the business and that’s gone now. So I wanted to write a few things but just haven’t felt like it.

So now the task begins to find a job. I have one slight problem that will make it hard for me to find a job till December. I have a class two days a week, from 11 AM till 12:30 PM. I hope I can find a job in marketing. If anyone knows anything please let me know!

Happy One year Anniversary

Hey guys,
My one year blog anniversary was Monday, I wanted to do a great blog post but I found out Monday our family business is or was closed and kinda shot my day all to hell and i forgot bout my anniversary till now. YEAH One year, I plan on writing a few things but life kinda sucks right now but I will write tonight, It maybe a twofer day or threefer day. Who can say. Thanks for reading
Tim

Hot guy Update

Hey guys, been trying to update the Hot guy of the week, but Blogger is having issues uploading pics. Will keep trying through out the day! Have a great day and watch for hot beef here soon!

Hot Guy of the Week #5

Hmm, I love a guy in a baseball cap. This week it's' boys in baseball caps.



Nothing better then a beefy boy in a baseball cap!

Enjoy guys.

DISCLAIMER: I make no claims as to the sexual orietnation of guys in the Hot Guys of the Week, they are pics of guys i think that are hot that i get off the net.

When a post isn't a post

Hey there, I know this week I’ve been very bad in posting. I try to go every few days and post. But this week I’ve done not much. I apologize, I have had a lot of school work and am working on a few good posts. Three new ones and I’m in no mood to write. I had to be up late last night, for the third night in a row, and do school stuff, run all over town for work and I’m just beat. I’m in no mood to write. I tired to write one easy one but it’s sucks. I also had a major test to day and I felt like we I was bitch slapped. Just a very hard test. I promise to write more this weekend and get some stuff together. Hang in there with me.

Underwear is Everywhere!

Ok, I’m going to talk about something fun. That is my fetish for Undies! Lately I have noticed that there sure seems to be a lot of underwear ads and pics of guys in undies everywhere. The most recent is the ad for Gay.com



This ad really took me by surprise. The undies around the ankles are pretty hot to me. “More then meets the eye.” I’m not sure this tag line really goes with the pic but hell, I don’t mind. But hey it gets me to stop and look. I wont’ go into advertising principles I’ve learned but, I’ll just enjoy the hot ad!

Another area that has taken me by surprise was Speedo is now making undies.



I couldn’t believe it, and they look pretty cool too. The only problem is the price, again back to the 20 bucks for a brief discussion I’ve had before. But price aside, the undies are cool as sh*t. I looked them over at the Speedo site and how can you go wrong with undies being modeled by Michael Phelps. I’m sorry I think he’s a total stud. Yeah he’s younger then I like them but there is something about him that drives me crazy. HMMMM, Now if they could just get him to model the undies on the site, I’d love it. The ads I have seen are online and show Michael in various sexy looks. Like the one above. WOWSA! Boy is he hot.



Another great ad is from C-IN2, from the guy who brought us 2(x)ist. The kick off ad showed two guys in C-IN2 undies. pants around thier ankles, getting arrested by two hot cops (see pic above). Now, I wouldn’t mind getting arrested by them, they are pretty hot cops. This ad I will say just kinda took me by surprise. Usually for most underwear ads they are just guys standing around in undies by themselves, or more then one but nothing much happening. This ad is pretty cool. I have yet to get an of the C-IN2 undies, but I think they are great looking and 2(x)ist was, hope to get some very soon.



I have noticed that there are fewer and fewer boxers these days. Which to me is a good thing. I hate boxers to wear and they aren’t the least bit sexy. I have noticed a lot more briefs and some bikinis. Some of the new brands that I see a lot of lately are Go softwear, Aussiebum, Baskit, CK, 2xist to name a few. They are all moving towards microfibre and making more form fitting undies. This is a very good thing. The pic I created from pics from the internet show this. A lot of guys are getting better undies. Not the typical tighty whities and boxers. They are getting more microfibre, colors and styles. As many of you know I hate boxer briefs with a passion, they are too loose and provide no support and bunch up. Unless they are like the bike shorts one or made out of microfibre. I love those. I think men’s undies is going high tech. We are getting more comfort and style then ever before. But one thing about the new boxer briefs or trunks as they call them is that they are very designed to be very eye catching and fun. Look at the 2(x)ist ones that are black and white. Those are pretty cool. Also CK is doing some really great stuff with undies. I’ve never been a fan of CK, except for the white briefs, but lately they are getting better at undies, I have a few pairs and they fit incredible. They have started to use many colors and different styles, which is great. Even Jockey is doing some really cool new undies. I think everything is moving towards form fitting comfort and that is great! Take a look at some of the pics from the box covers and off the company web sites



I think there is a turn in underwear makers for men. Underwear is definitely changing. Which is a good thing. The 90s and the first part of 2000s were so boring for underwear. All we had was white, black and grey. How boring is that. If you’re old enough to remember the 80s, then you remember men’s undies were fun. We had colors and patterns and they were great. This was the best time to be wearing bikinis; there were so many brands and styles. Which unfortunately went away by the early 90s. But there seems to be a come back and more colors are coming back. I should have a contest “Show me your sexiest Undies” and win some. HMMMM, but I don’t think I have enough readers to do that yet and I know a lot of you guys wouldn’t send in pics cause you’re my friends and I know you that well!

Has anyone else noticed this about undies lately? Or am I just imagining things? Would love to have some of you post comments and tell me what you think, even if you don’t have a thing for undies, I’m an equal opportunity comment whore, opps, requester!

Have a great day guys.

Hot Guy of the Week #4

I love these pics that guys take of themselves in the mirror. There should be a site of pics like this. I also have a thing for guys in baseball caps!


Ok, another fav of mine is a big beefy daddy type like this one! He is yummy and what more can you say.

DISCLAIMER: I make no claims as to the sexual orietnation of guys in the Hot Guys of the Week, they are pics of guys i think that are hot that i get off the net.

Seven Things

7 things I plan to do before I die:
1. Go to Australia and Bondi Beach (hot men in Speedos, my kind of heaven)
2. Buy a House
3. Get a Career (Yeah, I need one desperately)
4. Go to Yosemite Park
5. Fall in love again (sometimes you gotta wonder)
6. Try Standup Comedy
7. Get a body that I can be proud of!

7 things I can do:
1. Change a Tire (I can be so butch)
2. Figure out market share and industry growth in marketing
3. Problem solve
4. Write pretty well, been told I have a unique style of writing
5. Tell a joke, so many can’t
6. Navigate anywhere in ATL and have a good sense of direction
7. Program my VCR

7 things I cannot do:
1. Sing, I’m worse then William Hung
2. Tie a tie, it’s true, I have someone tie it and keep it tied LOL sad huh
3. Hit a softball out of the park
4. Spell, dyslexia has a way of keeping you from doing it
5. Write a resume to save my life
6. Work a calculus problem (the only class I ever dropped)
7. Go on a third date (LOL, one or two but thirds are rare)

7 things that attract me to the SAME sex:
1. Humor
2. Eyes
3. Laid back personality
4. Great smile
5. A good butt, yeah I’m a butt man
6. Intelligence
7. Good conversationalist


7 things that I say most often:
1. Cool
2. Sweet
3. Whatever
4. FIX IT FIX IT FIX IT! (Said real fast, my new one)
5. It’s all-good
6. Don’tcha (insert any of the Pussy Cat Dolls song after that)
7. Good deal


7 celebrity crushes:
1. Jake Gyllenhaal

2. Ryan Reynolds

3. Javy Lopez

4. Cael Sanderson (Olympic wrestler)

5. Michael Phelps

6. George Eads (CSI)

7. Roger Clemens (yeah I like a lot of different types)



7 people I want to do this:

• I need more blog buddies!

Four More Years!

NOT, I think the whole 4 years, as I’ll call it, was good for me. But would I want to do another 4 years, HELL NO! You know I have made a lot of changes and have really focused on myself and getting my life in order. I will be the first to admit that I have really been lost at sea and really had not clue what to do with my life. I’ve always been my worst enemy. But this past year, things have turned the corner. You know I realized who stupid I was being and how I took things way to hard. The absence of sex, I think made me get out and sort out my problems. I used sex as an escape from my problems, and I was in the school of thought that if I ignore the problem it will go away. Which it never solves the problem it just gets worse.

The whole experience last week was kind of an awakening. I realized, A, how much fun it is and sex should be fun. And B. I have control over myself and what happens. To part A, you know I was a slut, I admit it and used to sleep around a lot. And at times it was a chore at times. To me doing the topping or the big deed to me seemed like a chore that I was supposed to do. I realized in the last few years that any time I have topped and really enjoyed it was when I knew the guy, dated, or was boy friends with the guy. The times I really didn’t get into it was, a trick or one nightstand. Last Friday was just awesome, and I really like blue eyes, and he wasn’t pushy about it. So I said to myself why not let’s do it. Secondly, I have control on what happens. For the longest time, I used to do what was expected of me or what I thought would make people happy. God, and that’s a never ending cycle, I mean you’re always trying to make people happy and you go out of your way, and the only one not happy is me. I had to realize to say no. Which is hard to do but once you do it, it starts to come natural. The first time I said NO, I was scared to death the person would say “To hell with you” but they didn’t, they were like OK, that’s cool. I was like WOW this works.

I think what’s really changed this year is I have developed some self confidence and self esteem. I think this is due largely to this blog and J2. It’s the whole, you have to be a friend to get a friend. This is never so true. I have been told over and over again that I was negative, and down and depressing. I know this was true too. I kept everything to myself and knew I could count on me, and that was the only person I could. Well I guess I finally reached the breaking point and I got the blog and J2 and a few other friends and I’m just now tell it all. I have been told that, especially, when it comes to dating, that I tell too much too soon, but you know I’d rather tell it now then have it come back later and haunt me.

Just a quick update on the 4 years, I’m going to try to write something fun later this week!

The Four Years

Ok, this has been the weekend on big changes. For those of you who know me, know that its been four years, Aug 2001 since I last did the big deed, if you don’t know it’s topping. Well as of last night the four years ended. Before I get into what happened last night let me explain the reason for the four years.

The last time I topped was Aug 2001, as I said and it was the time of an HIV test and they always freak me out, no matter how safe I always go “What if?” And the two weeks to get the results, I kept going, what about this, what about that, and I had played with someone who was HIV positive and didn’t tell me, so that was in the back on my mind. A friend back then that HIV is much harder to get then it was, and he knew what I did and how safe I was and that I had not much to worry about. Well the results came back negative and I realized it was time to make changes.

Up until that time, I was pretty much a slut. Yeah I admit it, something’s in your past you’re not proud of but you know it happened and it’s a part of what made me what I am today. I think you should never run from your past, you should embrace it and learn from it. I have not clue how many people I’ve been with or really cared. I used sex to fill a void in my life. Before I go any father, I want to say this, I’m not saying if you enjoy one nighters or sex, then you’re less of a person, hey as long as you and your partner you’re with know it’s just a one time deal and you’re safe go have fun. I just realized it was not for me. And I would be a hypocrite. I’m only a hypocrite on one thing and I’ll discuss that later. I had been pretty much a loner, and really the only really close intimate contact was tricking and one nighters. I had really low self-confidence and was really shy. I think as gay men we mistake sex for intimacy at times. Not always but I know I did back then. You think if you get naked and go at it then you’re intimate with someone, well you’re not. But it’s that close physical contact that we all crave and you get it for a few hours and then, at least for me it left me lonelier and emptier then before. To hear someone say you’re so hot, you’re incredible to name a few, is great. But it’s only in one aspect. It’s not the person you are but what you’re doing in bed. It was a self-destructing cycle. You have the contact then you regret it and you do it again. I think for me I needed to realize there was more to me then a certain part of my anatomy. Which, I’m guilty of using in wrong ways, and if you want to know more email me, but it’s similar to =Cuteyoboy’s blog entry “Details” (was trying to do a link, but blogger for Mac ain't takign my html. Just go to the side, click on Cuteyoboys link and read the entry). It’s the be all end all of the gay world, and trust me boys it ain’t all what it’s cracked up to be. I plan a whole entry on that, but going to do a little research first, oh get your mind out of the gutter!

So, after the test I just realized how self destructing the cycle was, and how it was time to make changes and get out from under the depression I was in. So I said no more, and that day I did it. I realized something, that most of the times when I topped, it was a chore, for a lack of better word. It really didn’t do anything for me; I just did it because it was what was expected. I looked back on the times when it felt the best, I realized it was when I was with my Ex, a guy I went on a date on, or a FB/Friend with benefit that I hung out with and also had fun with. I realized what these all had in common. These were all people that I had a connection with and liked. So I told myself you can do anything but topping, until I date. Well, as faithful readers know, LOL I’ll be waiting till we put a man on Mars before that will happen. So, I really haven’t done much over the last few year, I have really slowed down and you know I kind of like it. There is less stress and I’m a lot happier knowing I’m not getting used for something or using someone else. I also came up with the “If I don’t like you I won’ sleep with you” concept. Which has made a big difference for me. It makes the activities a lot more fun and I have virtually cut out all one nighters. I usually get with the guy several times. But one year passed, then two and I was like OMG I’m actually doing this, then three, and finally four. All my friends can’t believe that it has lasted this long.

I will say that in the last few months I have really had the urge to top. The last time I had it so strong, I took pictures of a guy I play with on occasion. And as things progressed, I really wanted to top him, and would have. But he was a top too so nothing happened. So I have been like a buck in a rut, wanting to really go at it. But and this maybe something some friends may not know but I have been looking to have a friend with benefit. Someone to hang out with go to movies and then have fun. Now I didn’t’ want one where every time we get together we have to get naked. But occasionally would be great. So I had been on the hunt and I ran across one guy who I though was really sexy. We had chatted off and on for a while. And we finally decided to meet. I found out that he has had a partner of 16 years and they play separate, and for purposes of the blog, I’ll call him blue eyes, because he has great blue eyes and HMMM what a kisser. Ok now here is where the hypocrite comes in on me. I won’t share my man but I’ll share someone else’s. I know, BAD TIM, but hey if they are open and we hit it off why not? I don’t want an open relationship, maybe one day I will because I never say never. I’ve eaten my words too many times. But I went over to Blue Eyes house, stopped and got some beer and we hung out and talked for a while. It was pretty cool we have a lot in common and it was really great. We were in the kitchen talking and we kissed, and WOW can he kiss. We went to the bedroom and just started to make out and things progressed, you know how they do. Well, here’s why he got it when so many others haven’t. He never pressured me into doing it. He said it would feel nice but he didn’t get pushy or demanding. And I was thinking, you know it’s been 4 years and is this someone who, when I look back I will mind ending it? As I thought, I said no, because I felt a real connection and we have made plans to do things and he’s a nice guy. The only thing I wish we could have done is spending the night together but I’m very happy with the experience. It was AWESOME and Blue Eyes, and me laughed about our problems with my ankle, his knee and what hell it is getting old. Today I have been achy. I thought I was coming down with something but I realized in the act of, for a lack of better term, making love, my muscles are sore LOL, it’s so funny, when I was younger I was the energizer bunny and could go four hours and not be sore. LOL it’s hell getting older. But I’m really glad I went over and I have absolutely no regrets today and hopefully will get with him often.

When I left I called J2 last night right after I got out, and he was with his man and really surprised he answered his phone. He thought I was kidding first, but I was not, and he was happy for me. I told him, “ You know if I never see him again I had fun and really enjoyed it.” But I know I’ll see him again and hopefully often. I also called my SC Man, who has a friend with the same name as Blue Eyes, and he thought I had slept with his friend (The friend lives here in Atlanta area) and his partner was out of town. SC Man and his partner thought, “OMG what is he doing his partner is out of town!” LOL I got a big laugh when they thought it was someone else. But I set them straight and it’s good. I hopefully will go over there and meet them soon.

This whole experience has taught me that I can hold on to what I believe, and not fall back into old destructive behaviors. I have been worried it’s like Pandora box and that if I top someone I’ll go right back to tricking and such, I know, kinda stupid sounding. But you always go back to what you know. And this taught me that I’m not going to do what I did and that sex isn’t a bad thing. I was getting to the point where topping was bad and it’s not, as long as it’s done for the right reason. I realized today that I have really grown up and have started to make a life for me that I am proud of. I have much needed to make these changes and I think things will be good. Just curious if anyone else out there went through this? I just can’t believe that I posted so much and so personal. Thanks for reading!

Hot Guy of the Week #3

Hmm a hot bodybuilder, one of my favs. I wish you could see the full pic of his posing trunks!



A hot redneck beefy boy. yeah can you telI like many different types? Nothing like a guy in a truck!

Disclaimer: I make no assumptions on the sexual orientation of guys in the hot guy of the week. There are guys I find that are hot!

The Week Of Unexpected Turns. – Kathy Griffin Dream, Softball, Going Out And The Family Business.

Brief announcemnt: the lunch today is Meatloaf and Mashed potatoes, oppss wrong announcment, the hot guys of the week will be posted later, I fogot to do that this AM, they are picked out and just need to be uploaded!

I was going to write this earlier in the week but this has been a bad week and I try not to write when I’m really upset or depressed. And when I write when I’m depressed I just don’t write well. It’s one of those poor pitiful me. Which I’m trying not to do. So here we go….

Saturday night I had a dream and it involved Kathy Griffin. Who is my favorite comedian right now. I dreamed that I was one of her “main gays” and I was at her house, which I think is awesome, that house is incredible. But, as it has been reported, she filed for divorce from her husband Matt, and me and one or two others. Although I don’t know who they were, well we were hanging out and just talking then all of a sudden the phone rings and we’re told something happened to Kathy and she died while on the road. No, I don’t know where this dream came from and I think it’s totally whacked! It’s one of those you wake up from and go “What the f*ck?”, the dream ended when we were running around wondering what to do about it. I have no clue where this came from and why I had it, if Kathy reads this, LOL yeah she’s going to take the time to read this, I think you’re one of the best and brightest comedians and you need another DVD! Allegedly is AWESOME! Ok, yeah I have to give her a plug since I dreamed she died. BTW she also has a pod cast on Bravo’s web site, that give some in side info on what’s happened on the shows. Go download and enjoy!

The weekend was going good, I had a group meeting for school and then hung out with my friends J and B, and had a good day and I came home early because the fall season of softball started. Well, I guess I must have been excited because I left an hour early. I got to the field and I am on the green team and I think we have a really great team. I had so much fun and I actually played! Can you believe it? I played J’s team first. I batted left handed for the fist time; I batted about the same as right, pretty much grounders and always out at first. One other area that caused a problem is my favorite bat, is also J’s favorite bat, so we had to trade back and forth. So this went on and we were pretty evenly matched. But I don’t know who told someone to hit the ball to me, since I am in right field, yeah this is the “you can’t play softball so we’re going to put you in the middle of no where” position. I think J told them to hit the ball to me. Well it was a pop fly and I ran to get it and I caught it! That’s right I got an out. I don’t know who was more surprised, my team or me. I was so happy. I don’t think J believed that I caught it! But I noticed, that J’s entire team was using the bat, well I decided to put a hex on the bat and as I said use the “power of the chicken foot,” give it some voodoo curse. It must have worked because they were ahead and we tied in the 5th inning, before time ran out, and they scored no runs on their last bat. So the voodoo must have worked. The second game was good we lost; I think we were all tired but we had fun, this season is great, I’m really going to enjoy the 5 weeks we’ll play. And J kept the bat, which his fine, cause it’s going to be cursed, I have another bat I like and I ordered a new bat today, that is much better and we’ll see how the green bat does, It will be used sparingly!

Then after softball we went to Woofs and I had a great time. The coach of our team coaches, Woofs D level team and he’s a nice guy. I went and had fun. I wasn’t that shy, I had moments but I had a great time and really enjoyed it. I met a really cute guy too, Which I didn’t find out his name till I left and he told me how funny my comments were and gave me a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. I love J, but he never introduces anyone. You just want to smack him at times! But when I talked to the cutie, won’t give him a nick name yet, he said he would go to poker the next night so I was like, “hey this could be the Operation: Date Night, date. But he was a no show. So we’ll just have to wait and see when he is back at Woofs.

So this was a good weekend and I thought the week would get better, but this was soon to change. Like a black cloud looming in the horizon. I had a case for one of my classes due and my group partner and me wrote it up and well, we were told our case sucked, well not in those words but I’m paraphrasing. “That was the worst case I’ve ever heard” was the direct quote. OK, granted it wasn’t’ the best but he wanted power point and this whole long thing, that we were like “WHAT?” it was a case on GE in Hungary, and what he said it was about, was how to keep investment in China from expanding, which I was like, are we reading the same book? So I went to Woofs and had a few drinks and came home.

This was only to be matched by problems at work. Which is family. I have some words of advice, NEVER work with family. It sucks, and I’m not talking as in it sucks a little, it sucks a lot. Now I know I haven’t had the best work experience, and have not put out my effort, but over the last year I have changed a lot and really have a different work ethic, but all the family can see is what was, and how many times a week can you be told you’re stupid before you just really don’t give a damn? That’s where I am, they don’t say I’m stupid but they imply it. If I didn’t have my Tues/Thrus class I’d be working anywhere but there. I have a few events to go to this week about how to find a job in marketing from the Atlanta AMA (American Marketing Association). So this is good timing. I don’t want to go into the whole family/work thing, I’d type more then you’d read. There are a lot of things that I don’t want to go into right now. Some of it probably when I move out, I will see differently, but right now it’s dysfunctional and driving me crazy.

But, I hope this makes sense and you can follow it. I had a friend send me who well I have been doing writing in the blog, and how better I’ve become doing it. Which I’m not sure this entry is one of my best and I hope it makes sense. I’m tired and need sleep but I wanted to write this and post this, I’ll prob have to clarify what I wrote later. I hope you have a great day and I’ll keep you posted on what’s going on.

Life's Lessons Learned

This for me is somewhat of a usual post. As many of you who have read the blog, which It think there are maybe two people outside of my friends, actually read this. I’m going to be serious for a change. And really open up. So here goes, but I’ll throw my sense of humor in too.

The last year has really been a growing experience for me. I’ve always lacked self-esteem and really have doubted everything I do. I haven’t held a job and stuff like that because I believed that I couldn’t do it or wasn’t worthy of it. I know stupid, but when you’re told for years and years you’re stupid and such, then you believe it after a while. This is due to my dyslexia. No one in school knew about it or diagnosed it or anything. So for the most of my life I’ve gone through life thinking I was stupid and couldn’t do things.

Well, that began to change when I started back to school in 1999. I almost dropped out my first semester back, I didn’t do well in either class, accounting or economics and just thought I didn’t have what it take to be back in school. I swear I almost cried home after getting my first tests back. But after some serious thought I applied myself, and other then that year I have made all A’s and B’s. I mean since I’ve been back I’ve had a 3.6 or something like that, but mixed in with my other grades I’m a 2.87 now. I took all the business classes and have learned a lot.

I used to work at a catering company delivering and then got a job through a friend at a telecommunications consulting group, which something told me not to take the job, but I did and I worked there for six months. Got laid off, and I kinda felt sorry for myself but I wasn’t devastated. So, after I finished school for the semester I came to work for my family, but as most of you know that’s driving me crazy but it taught me one thing. I know what I’m doing in business. I couldn’t believe how much of my schooling came in handy and how I knew what I was doing. This really started things coming together for me. I was like, OMG I know what I’m doing. So this experience working with family is a good and a bad one.

Another turning point in my life this year is meeting J2. This is prob the most important person in my life right now. He is the only person that I have ever really opened up too. I can tell him anything and it’s all good. It’s very refreshing to have someone like that in my life. And I’m trying to change my self and get my life on track and be the person I know I can be. I think the turning point in our relationship was when the day I got him upset about not spending anytime. Things just sort of fell into place and that day I realized a lot. We talked the following Sunday night and I just feel like I know him for so much longer then I actually have.

PS I had a great weekend and a lot happened, I will update a lot more this week. So stay tuned, just havne't had time to write, but plan to do some major writing this week!

Hot guy of the Week #2

Ok, this guy is hot, because it think he's' wearing a thong. HMM and if you've been a faithful reader of my blog you know I love dudes in thongs. Plus he's very cute, guy next door type. The kind that drive me wild.


Now this is a beefy boy. I love beefy boys too, HMMM nothing like some good All American Grade A Beef.

Hope you enjoy the guys.
Disclaimer - I make no claims to the sexual orientation of guys here, in the hot guys, they are pics I get off the net that I think are hot.

The Terrible Rotten No Good Week

This week started off strange. You know when you just get a feeling that things aren’t right but you can’t put your finger on it. Well this was my week for that. I had my own problems as well.

The week started off as any other week. I had troubles at work and you know I realized I do not want to work in the family business for the rest of my life and I want to move out and in with some friends by January. So this has been a fun week, but wait it gets better!

I talked to a guy I know online, a good guy, we’ve known each other off and on for about 5 years or so. He told me his best friend committed suicide a few weeks back. He was doing a lot better then I would, if mine would have done that. He talked to me and I just listened, he’s a great guy and you know you just wanted to hug him. I won’t go into detail about what he said but this really wasn’t good. I need to cal him today and see how he’s doing. I think I’m one of the first people he talked too about it. You gotta be there for people, and I think it does a world of good knowing someone is there even if you can’t do much to help, a hug goes a long way.

That was one, well they say it happens in three, and well here goes number two. I went to a meeting at school last night and I got to the room early and it was locked so I brought out my laptop, and got online to chat and kill time. One other friend who I’ve known for about 7 years told me he got diagnosed with cancer yesterday. I asked him, before I found out, “How are you” and he said “I’ve been better” and that’s not a usual response. So I asked what was wrong and he told me, he doesn’t know much about it but they have a lot more tests to do and hopefully they caught it early and he’ll be ok. He lives near me and I will do what I can for him and his family is here too so that’s good as well.

Lastly, another friend told me they had a big meeting, and two VP’s that work there were asked to resign, and they are doing away with the product line he works on. So he maybe out in the street looking for a job soon. Luckily he just got a lead on a much better job and I hope it works out. This was out of the blue, just sorta like you get hit upside the head with a baseball bat.

What a week. This week totally sucked. I had a feeling from the beginning of the week, something is off. I didn’t really pay it any attention. OH, before I forgot, I almost got hit twice yesterday, once was going up the parking lot ramp, one of those circular ramps, well I was going all the way to the top, only place to park on Tues/Thurs, when I go to class. And this guy pulled right out of one of the floors and swear he was only inches from my fender. Then looked at me like I was crazy. GRRRR and the next is my light turned green, I turned left on a road, and a car was stopped at the right light, and proceeded to do a u-turn right in front of me. I swear, if it were legal I would have run them off the road.

The weekend is here, we’re supposed to start fall league softball this weekend but they said it may rain, like last spring season we didn’t’ get enough rain. Jesh! I think it will be fun, very laid back and I hope I can improve some skills.

I just need to grab a 12 pack and relax! But I think that won’ happen either since I haven’t been paid in a month. Why is it when you need a drink or a few drinks or OK a lot of drinks you never have money to buy them? It’s gotta be some cruel sick joke!

Oh well, I’ll post the hotties of the week later tonight. I have the pics already picked out, just narrowing it down, I think I’ll post two a week rather then one pic. Let me know what you guys think or if you want to be my hottie of the week, send me a pic! I’ll add some info about you and an email link.

Have a great weekend and I’ll write over the weekend.

I met the MAN

Last night I met J2’s man. Ok I know you prob thought I meant I met a man, nope sorry not happening today. His man, is nice and seems like a great guy. He wasn’t feeling very well last night, but he made a point to come out and meet me. Which I give him credit for that, J2 said he wasn’t himself. Which is cool, and they do make a good couple. They will be together for a while. I won’ go into any more detail because J2 will kill me, and he reads this regularly! I could say… nah I better not.

We ate at the Buckhead Diner here, which J2 got mixed up for another diner. It was a little more then I wanted to spend but wasn’t bad. The waiter was a little snotty, and it’s a higher class, for a lack of better term, place then I will usually go to just for a regular meal. Don’t get me wrong I’m not intimidated but I’m laid back and usually like the same kind of place to eat at. One thing about dinner with J2 and me is everywhere we’ve been lately has been with valet parking, and I hate valet parking. Just a waste of money. So we’re going to research before dinner. And J2, the bet is on! LOL (Inside joke)

As for a man for me. Well I haven’t really looked for operation date night. But I need to get on that. Dating to me just sucks. It’s always you can’t be 100% honest on the date, you have to hold things back at the beginning. I’m the kind where I just want to lay the cards on the table and say “hey this is me.” I guess that’s too much for some people to handle. Plus I’m a big smart ass so that comes into play too. But most of the time I’m really shy, believe it or not. A lot of people over the years say they thought I had attitude, but I don’t, I swear! I gotta do something about that.

Ok, I’m going to tell you people one of my dreams. I’ve been debating telling this but I say, heck I’ve told everything else, just about. I want to do stand up comedy. Yes, I think I’d do good at it. They offer a class here in ATL and I’m going to take it. I just need help doing a routine. Friends have said I needed to do it for a while and I think I will very soon!

Well I don’t know what else to say today. Just wanted to do a quick update. Keep those comments a commin’ and keep reading and tell your friends!

Cya, have a great one

The Orange Undies and Shyness

OK, first things first. Over the weekend I was hanging out with my friends and I went without undies, I know an occasional occurrence for me. But this day it was driving me crazy. So we went to Target, and of course I’ve already mentioned they have the undies on clearance, and was going to get some. But what did I see? Well they had the same kind of undies but in bright orange! YES, I couldn’t believe it; about time we got some color in undies besides black, grey and white. So you know I had to get them. They are pretty darn cool. They have redone their undies and I say GO TARGET! Good inexpensive undies.

OK, now to the main reason of the post today. I had another of those eureka moments over the weekend. When I go out and do stuff around people I don’t know, I’m pretty quite and keep to myself. I kept wondering what was up with going out? Why didn’t meet people like J and a few other people? While chatting online with a guy I realized, I just get very shy around people I don’t know. I know which is ironic since I type all this stuff on my blog. But like I’ve said it’s something of anonymity for me, since a lot of people don’t know me and some of my friends have just started to read it too. But this shyness is something I have to deal with and get over. I have to learn to be myself and not worry about what others think. I’m just going to have to get out there and talk and not be so introverted. I am not when I go out with friends, but when I’m out with one friend, and a bunch of new people I am. I guess, I need to find out how to get over this and get out there. I guess a lot of guys think I have attitude, which I don’t. I guess this is something I need to investigate and figure out what a good game plan is. If anyone out there has identified this problem and can give me some advice, email me and let’s talk. I wish I had one of my long posts but I’m just not sure what to say. I think a lot of my problems will be solved when I’m able to move out and start living my life. Good news from this front is I have a place to move out too, just have to get a job that I can afford my bills and necessities of life.

One other thing, I think its time to resurrect my culture night. (See my previous post). I’m starting to meet more people and think it would be something great to do. I’ll let you know when and how culture nights go.

BTW, I've had too many spam comments so I had to turn on the word verification feature. So if you leave a comment you have to type in the funky word that is listed above, I didn't want to do this but I've gotten tired of deleting about 7 comments a week. Hope this doesn't make you stop posting comments. Please post, I'd love to hear from you!

Hot guy of the Week #1

OK here ya go. Nothing says me like hot frat boys in speedos. Or, heck for that matter str8 boys in speedos. This is a hot pic. Yeah I may not date them but I'll post them.




Ok This pic is good too. I like the beefy boy on the right better but hey. A hot guy is a hot guy.

In the weeks to come I'll post a variety of guys. Some twink, some beefy, some avg guys. Keep coming back for more

Thanks guys

Hot guy of the week!

OK i know I said I would post it starting Friday, well I feel down on the job. I had school stuff to do and thre major papers to do. Tomorrow I'll post the guy tomorrow! hope you enjoy this feature! I need to get more traffic. LOL

Changes and Friends

As many of you know who are reading this blog, in the last month, there has been a bigger change in the blog and it has gotten more personal. Which I think is a good thing. I know why I do a lot of things I do, and I’m working on changing them. Which is not easy, nor is it an over night change. Right now I have very few friends to hang out with. Mostly it’s my own fault for doing it and I’ve let people go out of my life that would have been incredible friends. For that I will regret, but I can’t dwell on that fact and say, if only. That time has passed, and it’s time to move forward and get more friends and live my best life I can now and be a better person.

One thing about me and friends is I want new friends now! But the process of making friends is not one that happens instantaneously. It takes time and trust and you grow with the person. I guess that’s part of my frustration I’ve written before with J2, he’s one of my few friends and I want to see him and do things but with his schedule and new man it’s not possible. I still get hung up about it but it’s because I don’t have many other people to hang out with.

The main reason for this is School. This has become the foremost priority in my life. I have been going forever and I hopefully graduate in May of 2006. I’ve had group projects, papers and tests to do and frankly it’s getting me burned out right now. I wish I had time to just go out and hang out but I don’t. School has its trade offs and everyone says it will pay off in the long run but I want a life now. It will be so great to be able to just go out and do what I want when I want after I graduate. I’ve had people I met get frustrated because of me and my studying. Well, I gave it up for a man last time and I’m not doing it again. Most of my friends now what the deal is and respect that. Two new friends T&P, are really understanding. So, I can’t say school is the main reason why I haven’t gotten out there. I haven’t gotten out there because I had such low self esteem was not a fun person to be around. I think that is changing and will continue to change.

Ok, enough of the downer stuff. What kind of friends am I looking for? Well I want guys who are laid back, easy going and just nice guys. The guy next-door types. I’d love to find guys into golf, but I know that won’ be easy. But I want to get a great group of friends together to go to Braves games, camping, hiking, rafting, golfing, and just hang out. I’d love to grill out with friends in the summer, hang out drink some beer and talk. I don’t want guys who go out all the time. I like to go out occasionally but every weekend is way too much.

I also want guys who like road trips and going somewhere spontaneously. Or for that matter just call me up and say, “Hey let’s go to dinner or a movie” on a weeknight. I know it’s hard to find easy going laid back guys in the gay world. I don’t know why. I’m really tired of the typical gay club guys. You have to wear the right clothes, go to the right clubs, drive the right car, have the right job and all that. I don’t care about any of that, well maybe except the undies they wear LOL, but as long as you’re a good guy I don’t care what you do. For work I look at it this way you gotta do what you gotta do, so I never fault anyone for a job they have or second job, I have more respect for a guy who will do what he has to do, rather then one that refuses to get a job because it’s beneath him. It shows he has character and is a good person.

If you’re in the Atlanta area, or TN, AL, SC or NC, ah heck, anywhere actually, send me an email and say howdy. I’d love to make friends all over. When I get out of school I want to travel some. I wouldn’t mind meeting some guys off line and be friends with in anywhere in the world. Hey what’s the worst that will happen? You could have me as a friend.

Thanks again guys!

FORE! I played a few holes last night

OK, get your mind out of the gutter, not those kind, but golf. I had my final lesson last night and we played 3 holes. Was fun. The first hole I teed off really well, knocked it str8 down the course and not quite to the fairway. But it was a nice shot. Then the next few times I did it it sucked. LOL, gonna take a lot of practice.

The other times I teed off, I didn’t do so well. Or using the irons on the course, but the last hole I did hit it up the short hill to the green pretty good with my pitching wedge. I was happy. I just need to relax and have fun. So where are the gay guys into golf?????? If you’re a gay golfer say howdy!

Life took a turn yesterday, and I’m taking it surprisingly well or I’m in total denial. I work with family and something’s are tight with money and I haven’t been getting paid. Thank god for student loans, and tonight I find out if I have to drop my class or not and I’m really ok with it. I have grown some. Before I’d be freaking out, But it’s all good.

I also have had more friends read my blog and that really makes me happy. I hope more read it and hope that more do and others. I have decided to do something fun and just to gain traffic, do a hot man of the week. Or hot guy of the week. Every week post a pic of some hottie that does it for me. I’m not going to do just the typical smooth muscle twink. I’m going to mix things up. I like the way that Muscleboy in training does his. I got the idea from him, but plan to do it weekly and do all kinds of guys.

I am trying to get the traffic and more people reading. Post comments PLEASE, let me know what I’m doing right! Or wrong or just to find out more about me. Email me too. I did something too today that I shouldn’t have done. I got more Target undies, they rock and some BodyGlove boxer briefs, yeah I know I hate them but these rock, they are just like I like them tight and holds everything in place.

Well check back often and soon, I play to post a few times a week

Have a great one!

Hey Remeber Me?

You know there at days when something you thought you dealt with just comes back like a freight train. Yesterday was that day, it happened while talking to J2 were talking and I won’t go into what it was about, but the conversation was pretty innocent enough, but after it was over it really got me thinking of why I have been doing things in my life and how I could improve them.

We all know we’ve done stuff wrong, every one does, but it’s how you fix it that makes you the person you are. I’ve put off fixing a lot in my life; I used to be and sometimes still am, of the school, if I ignore it, it will go away. Which is never the case and it usually comes knocking on your door a lot later and with much more baggage for a longer stay. That’s what I’ve done with what I thought of yesterday. Things I thought were dealt with and over, are actually not. It was like I was hit with a ton of bricks, at one point while driving to school I almost broke down, I didn’t but I almost did.

I know some of you are thinking why did J2 do that? Well he didn’t do anything other then look out what was best for me. He was being a friend and he didn’t do anything wrong. It’s just one of those strange things when having a conversation, it triggers something else. This blog has been great for me to really open up and talk, I hope you enjoy it. You get to see the real side of me, part of it is because for a lot of people reading this, don’t know me and it’s kind of anonymous. The other reason is I have actually started to make major changes in my life and am working on being the best person I can be. It’s not an easy step or one that is done in 5 minutes, but I am building trust with other people and opening up and I’m not as negative as I used to be. So that’s a very good thing. It’s great having a friend like J2 in my life, for the short time I have known him, he has become a key player in my life and will be for sometime to come. Now if I can get him to read the blog! LOL, But he knows most of what’s in here before you guys do. He is the one person that knows more about me then anyone in the world. It’s great to have a friend you can tell the good and bad too and still be there and still be supportive.

Things are good today and I can’t complain, I just gotta stop being so hard on myself and holding me to different standards then everyone else. That’s basically what it boils down too. But hey you can prob tell a difference when I first started the blog and now!

Have a great day

Single Ain't So Bad

Ok, I make no bones about being single, kinda like my new god, Kathy Griffin, makes no bones about her being a D list celebrity, like Kathy I have embarrassed my inner singleness. I think she rocks, but moving on. You know I’m funny, down to earth, laid back, easy going and they don’t call me tripod for nothing! Yes that is true. I have references if you want to know, but don’t ask for pics cause I won’t send them. But What do I want? Well I want a guy who’s very laid back, and easy going. Not stuck in the gay drama scene, I don’t care if he goes out but don’t want the whole, did you see who he went home with last night, I don’t care who sleeps with who as long as he ain’t sleeping with my man. I want a guy who’s fun, and funny and keeps me laughing, there’s no easier way to get to me then laughing. That for me is the biggest turn on.

Ok, as for appearance, everyone goes, you have to be attracted physically before anything happens. That for me is not true. I have met several people and we became friends, and they weren’t Brad Pitt but nice guys and after I got to know them I really liked and though they were handsome. Their insides way out did their physical appearance and that to me is more attractive then the physical.

Hobbies and such. I would love a guy who would go camping, take a cooler of beer and grill out and have a great weekend. Invite a few friends a long and go have fun. In a camp ground near a bathroom! I’d also love a baseball fan, someone to go to games with and hang out. I think going to a Braves game would be an awesome first date.

I need an independent man too. One that has friends and we spend time away from one another and are comfortable with that. I think friends are one of the most important things in life and you have to make time for them. You need time with your friends. I’m not a very jealous person so I’m all about meeting new friends and hanging out.

Lastly, the most important topic, the bedroom. Now if you see me you think isn’t he sweet and cute and very vanilla, well think again! I’ve had my share of men, a friend used to say you’ve been around the block 4 times and stopped a every house twice. Yeah that’s true, in my younger days I was a slut. I admit it, I embarrass the slut I was, but I’m not now but that’ doesn’t’ mean I don’t like to get a little freaky now and then. I think if you have a man you should get freaky as hell in the bedroom, not the same thing time after time. If my bf comes to me and says let’s try this, I’m usually like, LETS GO!

I need to tell some former slut stories, or something here. But I hope this give you a better incite about me.
Have a great one

Underwear Ads

Most of you don’t know I have a unique collection. I collect underwear ads. Yup that’s right ads of undies. It’s no secret that I have a fetish for sexy undies (bikinis, thongs, and the like), Speedos, spandex and sports gear. So about a year ago I was bored on eBay and put in Jim Palmer Jockey Ad, and it came up. Those ads were hours of enjoyment for me in the 80’s. Now I wish I would have cut them out and saved them. I bought a lot of them on Bay aned it’s really cool to have them now. I also collect modern day ads too, the ones today are so sexy. Usually Out, Instinct or one of those has great ads.

So I’ve been doing this about a year and when I get my own place, I’m going to frame some of them an hang them in my office. I have the original CK one of the guy in white briefs leaning back, Jim Palmer, ton of them, and a few other hot ones. But there is a series of ads, well two, by Fruit of the Loom, yup I said it, Fruit of the Loom, of Football players in a locker room and I think another of baseball players. Which I want, every time I’ve big on them on eBay I’ve lost. So I found the football one on a site for 17.99, debating whether to get it. It’s a great ad.

I know some of you out there are wondering why in the world would I collect them. Well as I’ve learned in school, some advertising has become art, and that’s true. There are truly some great ads out there. Some worthy of being framed and hung on the wall. I think that you should do things that improve your home, and I frame postcards and hang them up and just really inexpensive ideas for a change.

If any of you out there see those ads, EMAIL ME RIGHT AWAY, I def want them and it’s not easy finding underwear ads. Wish I would have saved all my old magazines now. Oh well, Just an insight into me. I’ll keep you posted on what I do with the ads, right now they are in a notebook, I personally think it would bed great to hang in an office at home. Now the problem would be if I ever date would the bf let me LOL, especially if we shared an office. HMMMM.

Have a great weekend and don’t do anything I wouldn’t! So that leaves it open.

A drunken phone call

Have you ever had a call from a friend, who was drunk? I know many of you have, and sometimes its like “OMG, could you shut up!” But I got one last night and the friend will remain nameless. But he called me and was like don’t judge me because he was drunk. But you know he’s one of those loving drunk kind, you know the “I love you man!” type. But this person I know has been through so much and was interesting, they really opened up to me with their defenses down and it was great. He said something that really intrigued me and I will ask him about it this weekend, what he meant.

We all go through things in life and need friends. I can tell that there is more then meets the eye. I really hope they open up and tell me what’s going on. I really think they need a friend and I hope I can be that. I know I’ve blabbed a lot on here and my life is changing and I’m seeing some good, but still have a long way to go. But hey I’m working on it!

I took a test in my logistics class last night and OMG I think its’ time to drop the class, I knew nothing at all. And I studied, so I won’t know for sure until Wed of next week. But I still can graduate in May even if I have to take another class.

But that’s it for today and I’m going to go get some golf clubs today, I hope and get a playing, Any gay guys out there into golf, EMAIL ME!

Cya later…..

Shopping and Follow up

Ok, many of you know that I’m big time into undies, Speedos and spandex. Well that’s no secret, but I have to tell you about the buy I got this week. If you’re in the market for undies, I suggest you get to Target ASAP; they are having a clearance on some of their best undies. They sell this kind of microfibre ones, 4.99 a piece, for a bikini/brief, boxers brief and a matching t-shirt. Well the red, blue and green are all on clearance, as well as a grey, for 2.98 a piece, yup you heard me right, that’s dirt cheap, and these are great undies, these are the same ones I mentioned in the stripper blog entry. I bought a few of them, the t-shirts were 6 bucks I think, and not a bad price but I didn’t get any. So check them out.

I also have been invited up to Rivers Edge for a Speedo weekend. The Atlanta Spandex group on yahoo is making a trip up there. I wish the guys in ATL were more into this stuff; no one ever does anything about gear. So I think a few of us are going I’m waiting to hear back, and will write about it when I get back, that is if it happens. Should be fun and I can wear the new ones I bought at the boy next door. I’m not really in Speedo shape but hell there will be people in worse shape then me there naked so, I think I’m just going to go for it.

A follow up to J2, ok I sort of vented on here about things, I sent him a very long and personal email. I apologized for being such a butthead on the phone and things are good, I just didn’t realize how thin he was stretched until we talked. I remember being pulled from all ends when I dated and you reach a point you have to say no. But we had a great conversation and things will progress and he will prob be my best friend. The kind of friend I have been looking for to tell everything too and just be a good friend back too. It’s great having him and like the old saying goes, it’s about communication and you have to do it. I do that with him and we have a good relationship and I think it will grow stronger over the next few months, Hell it feels like I know him for years and it’s been only since July. So that’s a good thing.

I have golf lessons in a few mins, I really have gotten into golf, I think I’ll have a good time at it. I have wanted to learn forever, but the major pain is going to be finding left-handed golf clubs. Cheapest I’ve found are 225 at sports authority, and that was online, I need to go by the store and see if they have any.

Also, softball starts up in two weeks or so, will be great to get back playing, luckily this is a very laid back group and should be fun. I’m batting and catching lefty, so this is a first and we’ll see how that goes.

Nothing else is going on other then just being burned out on school, I have a test tomorrow and I’m so not ready and I so don’t care. But I will come home after golf and study my butt off, we have some sort of problem and I gotta look that over. I just need a vacation and relax for about 4 days. Somewhere on the beach or mountains, but that won’t happen anytime soon. But oh well I’ll hang in there, J2 doesn’t know it but I’m going to suggest a weekend get away soon, me, him, his bf and prob one other person, but we’ll see! If I can pry them apart LOL for a weekend. I’m so bad. Heck I may just go camping by myself one weekend and relax. I need some me time. Don’t’ know where yet. But I’m rambling and I make no sense when I do that. So talk at you later!

YUREKA! I’ve not been a good friend

Well, I figured something out this weekend while driving, yeah that’s where I do most of my thinking. I’ve written about J2 and his new bf and how I’ve been jealous and not spending time with him and the whole nine yards, well, I thought I was jealous of the bf, but that’s not it. While driving around I figured out why I was so jealous, it’s not that he had his particular bf, it’s that he has a bf. We met and then two weeks later he’s got a bf, you know I’ve been looking, not hard mind you but I haven’t found anyone. Just the fact he found someone so quick after meeting just threw me for a loop.

There is something about me, and I have noticed this time and time again, that when people either meet me, go on a date or anything like that, where there could be some relationship interest, the person who usually goes out with me finds someone shortly there after. I think I should just start charging people to go on dates with me and then a week or so later they will meet their next by. Kind of like match making but with no really work for me. Hmmm sounds like a good idea to me.

I talked with a friend in SC and he really put things in perspective with J2 as well, he said that I need to give him and his bf time to get to know each other and develop a strong relationship. Which is true, and when I talked to him (J2) on Friday I realized just how spread thin he is with work, bf, social obligations, parents and such. I remember being in that situation and its rough and I irritated him and now I feel so bad, I just didn’t know how busy he was, my SC buddy said you have to take what time you can get and that’s so true, 7:30 am calls and lunches and getting together during the week. Have to do for now. I just am used to calling a friend up and saying “Hey let’s go to ….” And get in the car and go, but can’t do that with J2 right now and yes I think he’s right when he says its all about timing, I feel like such a dope, butthead for Fridays conversation. I try to pride myself on being a good friend but I was not, he spent the weekend with his BF and I called yesterday and apologized on his voice mail and sent an email explaining this and a lot more and will apologize again tonight when we talk.

I guess the reason I get so insecure with J2 is that, we have so much in common and he’s the first real person that I can just be 100% open and it’s awesome, I’ve told him things that very few people know or none at all. He’s so easy to talk too and I guess I don’t want to share him but he needs to be happy and have a relationship and live is life too, just never really had a best friend that I did stuff with and told everything too. Which I am changing and doing well at. Just takes time. I’ve always been so protected, one reason is being gay for the longest time I thought so many would reject me if they knew, and other is my learning disability and self esteem, But those are changing and it’s a process that takes time. I just hope J2 forgives me for the other day, He’s damn special to me and he means a lot. BTW his bf is very nice and very good for him so for that I am very happy, hope to meet him soon and find out in person!

See I told you I’d write more
Tim

OPERATION: Date Night

OK, I know I haven’t written much, but school is kicking my ass this semester too. But I have decided something. I want a date, so we’re putting in operation Date Night into effect, yeah I’ve been single and am happy but you know I realized how long it’s been since I had date, I think a democrat was in the White House, but seriously it’s been a while. And I’m ready to date again.

The last few months I have really been working on me, and fixing what I thought was wrong with me. I think this is important to do. You know I don’t know if I’m ready to just get married, but I want to date more.

Ok, first problem, where do you find someone to ask out on a date? HMMM, Well I’ve tired the usual avenues, online, which you know most guys just want sex and RIGHT THEN, and friends, and I’ve determined that all my friends who are dating don’t know any single people other then me. So making me wonder do they actually exist? Hell, I’m this close to going to a gay match maker LOL. Don’t tempt me I’ll do it.

So My goal is to have a date by the end of October. Does anyone out there know of any laid back, guy next door types, that are single? If so send them my way!

Ok here's what I’m looking for:

• Laid back personality
• Has a good sense of humor
• Is smart, in what he does for a living
• Guy next door looks, I’ve never really clicked with muscle boys or overly “good looking” guys, just nothing there.
• I’d love it if he were into camping and grilling out
• A Big plus for a baseball fan, just no Yankees fans LOL well ok I’d date one but… I won’t go there LOL
• Lastly, just be nice.

Ok I’ll keep you posted, I promise, I’m going to create a logo for this, LOL yeah I have no life

Another day in the Week from Hell

Well this week for me personally has been pretty crappy. But, I’m surviving. I’m trying to keep a good attitude and at times it’s not easy. For the first time in my life, I really have confidence about finding a good job. I found that the college education is paying off. Right now I work for my father and it’s prob been one of the best things and worst things for me. But more on that later.

This week started off ok, and got worse, last night was the worst day. The whole gas thing, please don’t let me ramble on but it’s people being stupid in Atlanta and not paying attention to what is going on. NEVER believe anything on the internet. That you don’t check out as fact. But if I get started I’ll have 4 pages of ranting.

What else sucks, is right now I work for my family and live with them. Yes this is family overload. While the job has taught me my umpteenth thousands of dollars in college education have paid off and I know what I’m talking about in business, working with family is a whole other kettle of fish. I don’t recommend it for everyone. I in fact really thought about staying but realized after things happened today, that I really need to leave here after I get done taking my class, that is in the day. When you work with family there is a lot of baggage that goes along with you to the job and it’s not what I want. Plus I want do something creative and in marketing and not in the automotive parts industry, sounds so butch doesn’t it.

An incident happened today and it seems I’ve been blamed for things happening that I didn’t start, one thing about me don’ accuse me of something I didn’t do, I will fight you to the end. I try to treat everyone with respect and today someone went off at work and I wasn’t in the mood to argue so I didn’t say anything, but when something was said about statements being wrong they went off on me personally, not about work or anything but a whole rant about me and what’s wrong with me, I told them “I’m not in the mood today and if working here sucks so much then get your ass out and find you a new job.” I believe that everyone is held to the same standards. Then my mother told me to be nice to the person and that I started it, I was like wait a minute here, I didn’t not start it, I left, and I was not going to stand and be accused of starting something that I didn’t. Arguing with me about work is one thing but attacking me personally for not reason at all, well all I have to say is if you do, you better play to win cause I’m going to take you on full force. And another thing you should know, never ever hold money over me, like I give you your salary, I loaned you that money, etc, that don’t fly with me either, I’ll either find a new job, go borrow money from someone else or get money another way, you don’t hold it over my head. That’s what I told them today, I’d go drop my class and get a job somewhere else. So this January I’m looking for a new job that pays more and I’ll move out and start the life I want not what I have to take now, it’s all a sacrifice for finishing school, which will be done in May of 2006

One good thing is that a good friend of mine, J2 the one I talked about before, he and I have gotten closer as friends and he really means a lot to me, I mean he is one of the few people I have ever really just opened up too and just talk. It’s so great. I think when we had dinner and talked, I was taking a lot out on him and his new relationship that was displaced from other areas of my life. He’s a good man and I told him if the new bf doesn’t treat him right I’ll kick his butt (the bf that is)

Well that’s enough for now I guess; see I told you I’d write more because I have my new laptop! I love it.
Later…..

I'm Back

Ok, I know most of you wonder what the hell happened. Well, life happened. I had a really busy semester at school; I don’t ever recommend taking classes over summer unless you have to or a glutton for punishment. I took speech, which was ok and Philosophy, critical thinking over the summer, which the latter kicked my butt. Well I guess I need to update you on what’s been going on.

Well, pretty much the same stuff, although I got a new job working for my father and that has its ups and downs. More on that later. I have made a really good friend, whom I’ll call J2 that has its ups and downs and drama with guys.

Well when I last left you I was in school and wanting to make more friends. Well that is still the plan but school is way to busy right now. Which sucks, I have a few friends not many, and I want to make more but it’s hard when they call you to do something and I always say, “I have to study.” I know it’s a necessary evil for now and will pay off in the long run. Over the summer I met J2 and another guy we’ll call T, well things were really cool and we were going to do braves games, and hang out, camping and the works, but T turned out to be a missing in action friend. You know the kind never can get on the phone or call or anything. So I had to kick him to the curb and J2 met a guy and well you know how it goes when you start dating someone new. I kinda feel left behind and took me a month and a half to meet up with him again. Which sucks because have you ever met someone and it’s like you know them and you click so well, that 3 months seems like 3 years? That’s what J2 and I have, I know he needs to spend time with his man but it’s just frustrating.

My life is in a big state of change, and those who know me know I hate change, but after a few weeks I adjust. Again another necessary evil. I’m reaching the point in my life where I want to move out and make my own life and go from there but with my work situation and school I can’t do that. Have you ever reached the point in your life where you say “I’m sick of everything in my life?” Well that’s where I am. This will definitely be an ongoing post. I have tons of ideas and I gotta get back to the dating stuff and what this blog is about. Hell I’ve been single for 9 years I should have a lot to say on the topic LOL> Ok this is an update and I plan to keep updating at least 2-3 times a week now that I have a SWEET iBook laptop and can type from anywhere. Please post comments and let me know how I’m doing and what’s up with you guys
Be good
Tim
PS isn’t spell check great!

The Rainbow After the Storm

Well, here’s another posting in a day, I do that sometimes don’t I? Well, I have had two things happen today that was unexpected.

The first is, I have a profile on normal gay.com and I had forgotten about it and the nicest guy sent me an email. Telling me how good my profile was and gave a great intro on him, and just seemed like a nice guy. He had a damn good intro email. I wish I could write them that well I always sound like a dork when I write them. I haven’t heard back from him as of yet but would be great to have a new friend.

Second, a good friend in bama said, about my predicament “To hell with him it’s not your problem.” And you know advice that straight forward really hit home, it’s not really my prob, He’s not my bf and I’m not the one he did stuff with. Although I am reevaluating the friendship, I’m going to see how it goes over the next few days, and go from there.

I hope everyone else had a great weekend and I’m sure I’ll type more, I have neglected this blog for way too long.

A Gun and a Great Defense Lawyer

Is what I’ve been telling anyone who asked “Can I get you anything?” yeah still pissed, but not as much I got 10 hours of sleep so things are always better with a good night sleep. I just want to tell my friend how pissed off I am but have yet to get him alone to tell him. I will, but it’ll take time.

I made some up my mind on a few things. I seriously am going to work out and get in shape this year. I am making more friends, and I am not gong out alone with my friend from Friday. I don’t think it’s good for me if he continues to act this way. I don’t mind going out and having fun but not that.

This ties into dating. Because In the past I’ve always been the one to be walked on and give in and try to please the other person no matter what. I realized about 5 years ago that’s crap, yeah you should do things to make your partner happy but not at your expense. I want a relationship build on trust. I will trust a person till I have a reason not too. Too many gay guys just are in it for the sexual part and never think about the friendship part. That’s when some open it up and do what ever, I don’t understand the whole concept of it, I don’t like to share. I mean I will never say never but, I keep hearing from guys its easier then breaking up, well I’d rather break up.

But as things progress I’ll keep you posted on what happens.

The Day After, well somewhat

Well it’s been a day and to be honest I’m pissed as hell still. More so at my friend then anything else. I was thinking about the pool and thought, well what if I was in that situation, I brought a friend with me to a bar/or event and people wanted to have sex with me and not him. What would I do. I honestly don’t think I’d ever leave my friend, it’s not fair to him to have him wait while you go out.

I’m sort of on a emotional rollercoaster right now because one minute I’m fine and the next I’m pissed. This won’t go away till I confront my friend, which is hard to do with his partner around. So I may not get to do it, I did talk to him earlier and I said I didn’t get any sleep last night because I was pissed off last night, and we’ll see.

I have learned one very important thing in this whole mess, I am growing up. How you ask? Well let me tell you. Before when I ever got mad a anyone I knew that was it, I wanted nothing to do with them. And I’m one of those people who can hole an unhealthy grudge for years, tuck it away in my memory then see the person and it’s back in full force. All the people last night I don’t hate them, I like them and will be friends I just don’t like what they did. I told one friend earlier it was like being bitch slapped around last night. Things will get better and things will improve, I still need better confrontational skills and this will help.

I’m going to go lay down watch season 3 of the West Wing and relax. I’m watching them all over from season one to season four. Then News Radio then Quincy, yes you heard me right, Quincy with Jack Kludman. I know I spelled that wrong.

Have a great one and I’ll get back on track with the dating stuff and all this week.

Full Faith and Credit

This is a weird title I know, but it’s the only thing I could think to call it. If you’re familiar with the concept, it’s part of the US Constitution that gives an equal footing to all contracts and fragments in one state, the same status in another. And be warned I’m f*cking pissed off as hell so this will be a harsh entry and I really don’t care.

I went to an event tonight and expected to have a good time and hang out with some people I know. (I won’t say where or what although I’m half tempted to use real damn names). But I won’t do that, I went to the event with a very good friend of mine and the night was fun, until the end of the night. When my friend was hanging out with Alex and Dave, as I’ll call them for now. They were talking and one of the has a pool and from what I gathered, it was going to go skinny dipping at Alex’s and I’m like cool, But as the conversation went on, my friend said “aren’t you getting tired don’t you want to go home?” and Alex said “you can’t come you’ll open your damn mouth.” Now first off I don’t hear very well in bars, there is a problem that I believe is genetic, that in a lout environment like that I can’t hear anything. So I didn’t know what the fuss was to go skinny-dipping. Well they weren’t going skinny-dipping they were going to have sex. Which I didn’t know at the time. Until they said something I heard. We all left and on the ride over there I was mad as hell, not that they didn’t want to include me just the way they did it. I’m not attracted to Alex or Dave at all, so no hard feelings there and as for my friend I am not attracted either. One added thing, my friend and his partner have been having problems lately and they have talked about being open and I have no clue. So I drove his car over to Alex’s house and told him I would go to Woofs and he can go have fun and call me when he’s done, he said he didn’t want me to go alone and he’d go with me. He left went and talked to the two and said come and go have fun. I know me and I was in no mood to be there, and I have a saying “Don’t go where you’re not welcome” Which is how I felt, I was not a welcome person to be there. So, my friend comes back and says this and I say nope I’m not going, He went back with them and I went to Woof’s at first I was dreading going to a bar alone, then I saw Joey, who I used to work with and hung out. About 45 minutes later my friend comes back and said he couldn’t leave me, granted by this time he had already had what ever sex he had, and I thought we were leaving, nope he proceeded to make out with a few guys and I was tired, and still grumpy, You know and I just sat there while he made out with these guys, I wanted to go out and have fun, hang out not watch him suck face. OK I can hear some of you say, you’re jealous, I’m not at all, I just don’t want the information I have incase his partner asks me. I don’t want to be in the middle of something like that. When I go out I want to have fun and just hang out and cut up, not get someone laid, you know sitting there made me feel like the shy introverted 16 yo I used to be. Dorky and self-conscious, I have come a long way but I’m just going to f*cking level and say some things I was going to say but didn’t know how to say or if I wanted too. Some of you are now saying, Well you’re just jealous of your friend getting some. No, I’ve been through my slut phase and I’m pretty much over it, When I have sex know I want to know the guy and like him and have it mean something. I’ve had tons of sexual encounters over the years that didn’t mean anything and it left me emptier then when I did it. Fact #1, I have a big dick, yeah I said it, I can get just about any btm I want in Atlanta, and have, All I have to do is get on aol and I could have one in 5 minutes. But I don’t want that. So all you people say I can’t get a man to truck, BITE ME! FACT 2: I’ve reached the point in my life where there is so much more then a trick, fling or one nighter. If you want to do it, then knock yourself out I won’t judge you or anything, it’s just not for me any more. Even the guys to night I still like them and don’t hold any bad feelings but damn, learn how to be more direct and say “You’re not our type” or “There’s no Chemistry” what ever., I ain’t heartbroken in the fact I didn’t go to the pool, actually I’m very glad I didn’t go. Hell I haven’t topped in 3 and a half years, August 2001 was the last time. That has been my choice, and one I’ve been happy with. FACT 3: When I do have sex, I want to have it with someone I like and know. Not someone I met for 5 minutes, I want a connection, I’m not saying I have to date, but I’d like to like the person before I get naked. I’ve had tons of sexual encounters where after it was over I was like why did I do that? I want to leave now, this person is an idiot.

I’m pissed off because of several factors and I choose the title because no matter what I should be able to be pissed. First be honest, that’s all I ever want, I’m not saying It’ll make things 100% great, but tell me up front, not my type, ugly, what ever you want. Just be F*cking honest with me, I’ll get over it better. Second, I don’t want to be in the middle of something between my friends. And I know I will be, I see a light at the end of the tunnel and it’s a damn train. I’ll get screwed. Lastly, if I go out with a friend I want to go out and have fun not watch you spend the night making out with god knows who. I want your company and not be the third wheel, again refer to rule one, if you want to do that be honest with me and say, I want to go get lucky, and I’ll either invite another friend or not go.

I’d be curious to know what some of you guys think, Leave your comments or email me. I didn’t’ argue with my friend because I’m VERY MAD and I never argue this mad, I need to cool down, second, he was drunk, I know this because I told him the same things twice and he didn’t remember them.

Single = Desperate?

Welcome boys and girls today we have a math lesson, Does being single mean you’re desperate? Let’s ponder the evidence shall we…. Well not exactly a math lesson, and before I get going too far, I know I’m going to have to get a big leather daddy to grab a paddle and spank my ass for not writing like I should here. That said. Moving right along….

I went out Sunday night to Woof’s after softball because they were the host bar and it was ok, but half way through the night, a few of my team mates decided they were going to get me laid. And upon reflection, I got pissed off, hell I was pissed off at the time. Some how they got it in their head that being single and not having a sex life (we’ll talk about that in a sec) I am desperate. Well, for one, my sex life is where it because I want it there. I used to be a ho, hooking up and tricking a few times a week. But the reason I did it was because I wanted to get companionship with out the attachment. And I’m not saying that if you go around and have sex (as long as it’s safe, that’s another whole discussion) then go have fun, as long as you’re both on the same page, knock your self out hang from the chandeliers and break out the hand cuffs.

Back to my story, well they kept going what’s your type and I was pointing out guys. That I liked, but that was a bad night at the bar. I though we were talking get me a date, but they were talking “lets get me laid”. So one of them had a friend come up and he was ok, and they told me that he was single and such, he wasn’t really my type but sometimes I’m just too damn nice, and then they went and talked to him and made me go talk to him. First he wasn’t my type and second he was drunk off his ass. Not a good first impression.

But why is it most guys in a relationship think us single guys are so totally miserable without a man? What’s up with that? In the last few years I have really done things that were good for me and made positive changes. Ones I don’t think I could have done dating. But who know, I would love to hear from some of you about this. Give me your 2 cents!

This is your Job ........

Ok, so I’m stealing, well that’s such an ugly word, I’m borrowing an idea from Scott-o-rama. He has on his site get Scott a new job, well since I ain’t got one, it’s get Tim a new job. I learned in my advertising class that 50% of new advertising is just copied from someone else, so why wouldn’t this be good enough for a blog ideas? So here goes:

What I am looking for in a job:
• Location, well I would love a job in Buckhead, Midtown or downtown, to be close to school but hell I ain’t picky, it if pays I go where ever it is.
• Type of job: well I’ve only done administrative jobs, and its what I know but I’m at GSU downtown and closely approaching my graduation date, May 2006, I see the light at the end of the tunnel and it’s not a train this time. I am going to school for marketing so I would love a job that has either an entry level marketing position or an admin one where I can move up as I graduate and gain skills
• My qualifications and what I like doing: I would love a job doing PowerPoint Presentations. I am really good at designing custom presentations. That includes backgrounds, bullets and graphics. I have advanced MS Office skills and am a wiz at anything in office. I eventually want to go into special events/convention Planning and also give presentations. I took a great seminar last week and giving them is a lot easier then I thought. I was taught some common sense about them. Lastly I have 5 or more years working admin and previous to that was retail.

Anyone out there know anyone hiring in the ATL area let me know, SEND ME AN EMAIL ASAP! See this isn’t exactly like Scott’s

I'm Back

Hey there,

I know you think I just dropped off the face of the earth but I didn’t. I’m back and better then ever, or so they say. Well not really LOL, I got done with the semester and now job hunting. Which sucks big time. But unlike last time I am being proactive and really looking. Last time I got laid off I was so depressed and miserable that I just sat around. Not this time. I’ve only been seriously looking for a week or so but things will happen.

That’s all that is happening to me I’m going to try to get back on my schedule of postings and topics, but for the life of me I can’t find my list so I’m going to create a new one tonight and get started.

Have a great day
Tim
PS if you hear of any jobs in ATL let me know