Full Faith and Credit

This is a weird title I know, but it’s the only thing I could think to call it. If you’re familiar with the concept, it’s part of the US Constitution that gives an equal footing to all contracts and fragments in one state, the same status in another. And be warned I’m f*cking pissed off as hell so this will be a harsh entry and I really don’t care.

I went to an event tonight and expected to have a good time and hang out with some people I know. (I won’t say where or what although I’m half tempted to use real damn names). But I won’t do that, I went to the event with a very good friend of mine and the night was fun, until the end of the night. When my friend was hanging out with Alex and Dave, as I’ll call them for now. They were talking and one of the has a pool and from what I gathered, it was going to go skinny dipping at Alex’s and I’m like cool, But as the conversation went on, my friend said “aren’t you getting tired don’t you want to go home?” and Alex said “you can’t come you’ll open your damn mouth.” Now first off I don’t hear very well in bars, there is a problem that I believe is genetic, that in a lout environment like that I can’t hear anything. So I didn’t know what the fuss was to go skinny-dipping. Well they weren’t going skinny-dipping they were going to have sex. Which I didn’t know at the time. Until they said something I heard. We all left and on the ride over there I was mad as hell, not that they didn’t want to include me just the way they did it. I’m not attracted to Alex or Dave at all, so no hard feelings there and as for my friend I am not attracted either. One added thing, my friend and his partner have been having problems lately and they have talked about being open and I have no clue. So I drove his car over to Alex’s house and told him I would go to Woofs and he can go have fun and call me when he’s done, he said he didn’t want me to go alone and he’d go with me. He left went and talked to the two and said come and go have fun. I know me and I was in no mood to be there, and I have a saying “Don’t go where you’re not welcome” Which is how I felt, I was not a welcome person to be there. So, my friend comes back and says this and I say nope I’m not going, He went back with them and I went to Woof’s at first I was dreading going to a bar alone, then I saw Joey, who I used to work with and hung out. About 45 minutes later my friend comes back and said he couldn’t leave me, granted by this time he had already had what ever sex he had, and I thought we were leaving, nope he proceeded to make out with a few guys and I was tired, and still grumpy, You know and I just sat there while he made out with these guys, I wanted to go out and have fun, hang out not watch him suck face. OK I can hear some of you say, you’re jealous, I’m not at all, I just don’t want the information I have incase his partner asks me. I don’t want to be in the middle of something like that. When I go out I want to have fun and just hang out and cut up, not get someone laid, you know sitting there made me feel like the shy introverted 16 yo I used to be. Dorky and self-conscious, I have come a long way but I’m just going to f*cking level and say some things I was going to say but didn’t know how to say or if I wanted too. Some of you are now saying, Well you’re just jealous of your friend getting some. No, I’ve been through my slut phase and I’m pretty much over it, When I have sex know I want to know the guy and like him and have it mean something. I’ve had tons of sexual encounters over the years that didn’t mean anything and it left me emptier then when I did it. Fact #1, I have a big dick, yeah I said it, I can get just about any btm I want in Atlanta, and have, All I have to do is get on aol and I could have one in 5 minutes. But I don’t want that. So all you people say I can’t get a man to truck, BITE ME! FACT 2: I’ve reached the point in my life where there is so much more then a trick, fling or one nighter. If you want to do it, then knock yourself out I won’t judge you or anything, it’s just not for me any more. Even the guys to night I still like them and don’t hold any bad feelings but damn, learn how to be more direct and say “You’re not our type” or “There’s no Chemistry” what ever., I ain’t heartbroken in the fact I didn’t go to the pool, actually I’m very glad I didn’t go. Hell I haven’t topped in 3 and a half years, August 2001 was the last time. That has been my choice, and one I’ve been happy with. FACT 3: When I do have sex, I want to have it with someone I like and know. Not someone I met for 5 minutes, I want a connection, I’m not saying I have to date, but I’d like to like the person before I get naked. I’ve had tons of sexual encounters where after it was over I was like why did I do that? I want to leave now, this person is an idiot.

I’m pissed off because of several factors and I choose the title because no matter what I should be able to be pissed. First be honest, that’s all I ever want, I’m not saying It’ll make things 100% great, but tell me up front, not my type, ugly, what ever you want. Just be F*cking honest with me, I’ll get over it better. Second, I don’t want to be in the middle of something between my friends. And I know I will be, I see a light at the end of the tunnel and it’s a damn train. I’ll get screwed. Lastly, if I go out with a friend I want to go out and have fun not watch you spend the night making out with god knows who. I want your company and not be the third wheel, again refer to rule one, if you want to do that be honest with me and say, I want to go get lucky, and I’ll either invite another friend or not go.

I’d be curious to know what some of you guys think, Leave your comments or email me. I didn’t’ argue with my friend because I’m VERY MAD and I never argue this mad, I need to cool down, second, he was drunk, I know this because I told him the same things twice and he didn’t remember them.