A Conversation with a Friend

A conversation I had with a friend online. It pretty much sums up what I've been going through the last few weeks. I'll keep you all posted on whats going on.

Friend: I have indeed decided to run away from home
Friend: good bye
Me: ah, what’s going on? talk to me
Friend: LOL
Friend: just kidding
Stuff about work I Left out

Me: eh, it's change and I hate change
Friend: me too
Friend: LOL
Me: and a lot of changes in the personal life too so, I just feel lost, I’m at the point where I wish things would stay the way they were but the way they were isn't good for me
Friend: why isn't it good?
Me: just I sit at home, do nothing, be lazy and I want to get out and make friends and do things then sit a home depressed saying Poor me. So I did softball, and will do some more things and work out, after seeing my pics yesterday DAMN, I’ve let myself go way too much, I have to do something and get a better self image
Friend: that all starts from within...there is something that is causing that and you need to identify and deal that whatever that is then all will fall into place
Me: yeah I’m going with it and I just get frustrated and such every so often, I guess it's the whole change thing, I just hate change but it's a necessary thing, and after 2 weeks, I’m ok, but that two week adjustment period I'm grumpy LOL and I Like the way you call me out on things, you're a good friend for doing that
Friend: sometimes it is something we don't wish to see or are not prepared to deal with
Me: well I know what’s wrong and I have known for a long time I just did nothing about it
Friend: ah
Me: the whole thing with Wayne made me realize this, and prob the best thing that ever happened to me
Friend: how so?
Me: just I finally let myself open up to someone and be venerable again, I didn't hold things in and try to impress him with things or try to be someone I wasn't, I was me, the real me. I've been so scared for so many years that if people find out I’m gay they will reject me, and I’ve had the opposite experience, I have to let that go
Friend: if they have a problem with that that is their problem...it does not belong to you...You are Tim...you are a great guy and if they can't see that so be it...we all click with different people so we will not always get along with everyone...just let it be and move on until you find the ones you belong with
Friend: you have to learn how to not accept other people's issues...
Me: I know I know, but for so long I have tired to please everyone, which the only person not getting pleased is me, I know but its' just working through it and taking the steps to get it done. I’m being honest with everyone I know now
Friend: :-D
Friend: well I need to get to school...be good...have a great day!
Me: you too and if you run away take me with ya